Loss, Statistics and Finding Me

It’s ok to not be ok.

Basking in Burgundy

I’m eleven weeks pregnant in this photo.

Long enough that the bloat meant my pants wouldn’t fit.

Long enough for a dot to grow to the size of a lime.

Long enough for plans to blossom and dreams to grow.

Only it was all a cruel trick. The baby, my little Sweet Pea was only the size of an actual sweet pea, my body had yet to recognize the loss.

I opted to wait for a natural miscarriage, to carry on life until the inevitable end. Only it didn’t.

For eight long weeks, we waited. Every week the same: an ultrasound and the news nothing had changed. Eight long weeks of carrying a child I would never know beyond the changes being created in my body- the severe nauseous, the bloating, the hormonal changes, all the typical symptoms of pregnancy but none of the joy to be found at the end.

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jer. 29:11

How does one cling to this truth when carrying a lifeless being within? How does one go from being a mum to every moment blaming yourself for being unable to support the little one’s life? To society, having a baby makes you a mum- losing one makes you a statistic.

“According to the March of Dimes, as many as 50% of all pregnancies end in miscarriage.” WebMD

What a statistic doesn’t tell you is everyone is different, how every story is unique, how every moment grouped together is completely individual. I didn’t have the miscarriage that was announced by blood loss. I didn’t have the miscarriage that was late term. I didn’t have a miscarriage due to eating sushi or drinking or deli meat. It wasn’t managed by Advil, it didn’t feel like cramping, it wasn’t over in a few hours. My miscarriage was “missed”. It was three rounds of labor inducing medication, several ER trips, dozens of prescription pain killers and ivs, and two months of bed rest. My miscarriage was finding out I was pregnant on our three year anniversary and surgery two days before my birthday. My miscarriage lasted into what should have well into my second trimester.

I didn’t just lose our Sweet Pea; I lost myself.

I hated my body: first for failing to keep my baby alive and second for failing to recognize the loss of my baby.

How does one recover from the loss of their physical and mental self?

I don’t know.

I’m not writing this with an answer. I’m not writing this for pity. I’m writing this to support the so called statistics. I’m writing this for every woman who has ever lost a pregnancy. I’m writing this to say:

It’s ok to not be ok.

It’s ok to not understand, to be angry, to be hurt, to feel lost. Through it all, the dark nights, the hard days, the tears BE KIND to yourself. Cancel all the plans, curl up in a ball buried under the blankets, turn off your phone. I cannot stress how important giving yourself time is. Time does not heal all as the old saying goes, rather it just gives you better ways to cope with the pain. Listen to your time- to how you feel, not how a doctor or a blog or a forum tells you that you should be feeling. You are not a statistic, you are your own story.

“There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens:

a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot,

a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build,

a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance.” Ecclesiastes 3: 1-4  

I’m not ok.

I don’t know when I’ll be.

 Until that day, I will continue to mourn, to value deeper the ones I love, and to search for ways to understand.

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PS: Here are two reads that have helped me not feel alone in this:

Melissa Rouch shares so many thoughts and feelings I thought I was alone with.

Leandra from The Man Repeller shares more on the self-compassion that is so important post miscarriage.



Fall is coming! Here’s My Summer 2017 Instagram Roundup

With summer rapidly drawing to a close, my heart rejoices knowing pumpkin patches, apple cider and bonfires are just around the corner! Summer is nice and all but I’m a true fall love. To me, fall is the season where everything comes alive- the air is crisp and the scarves are big!

This summer has been absolutely bonkers! It kicked off in Florida and is coming to a close in Washington State. What happened in between? Lots of moving around, visits with friends and one cross country road trip!

Summer 2017: Blogger Babes

Let’s start off the 2017 Instagram Roundup with some of my favourite babes! I was so glad to get to spend some time with my blogging bestie Shell from A Courageous Beauty and my shopping twin Kristen from A Midwestern Mix.  How gorgeous are these ladies? I recommend giving their blogs a check- you won’t regret it!

Blogger Besties

Shopping Besties

Summer 2017: Major Collabs

During all of the cross country road tripping and moving, I also was very privileged to work with some phenomenal companies! Here are two of my fav collabs of the season: Samsung and LIFEWTR (seriously GOOD hydration)!

Basking in Burgundy x LIFEWTR

Basking in Burgundy x LIFEWTR

Summer 2017: Major Moves

Speaking of the moving madness- driving across the country was one of the most beautiful experiences of my life, literally! Mr. K and I fell in love with Wyoming and are seriously considering living there post leaving the military life. Of course, all the driving and hotels left a little puppy very sleepy! (BTW these two shots didn’t make the ‘gram, they are just some personal shots I wanted to share).

Basking in Burgundy

Basking in Burgundy Dog

Summer 2017: All Black

Over the past few months of warmness, I also found a rhythm with my style- you wouldn’t believe how living out of a suitcase can change one’s style! I’ve always loved an all black look but really embraced the monotone during Summer 2017.

Basking in Burgundy- Style Blogger

Basking in Burgundy- Style BloggerBasking in Burgundy- Style Blogger

Something else happened during Summer 2017; I stepped away. I didn’t snap my way across America, I didn’t share every amazing meal or boutique coffee shop, I didn’t worry about likes or shares- I spent every moment in the here and now. Which is exactly what I needed. How was your summer 2017?

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A Leesa Mail Day Means a Better Night

“A good laugh and a long sleep are the

best cures in the doctor’s book.”

-Irish Proverb

Most of us know that the average adult needs eight to nine hours of sleep a night. Did you know that according to the American Sleep Foundation the average American adult gets less than six hours a night? All of those numbers added up to mean that we spend about a third of our lives in bed- and that doesn’t include all the time spent Nextflix and chilling there! That’s way too much time to spend with a sub par mattress.

Enter the Leesa mattress!

Leesa Mattess x Basking in Burgundy

1: Why do I need a new mattress?

“You’re rolling around in and inhaling all kinds of nasty particles — including allergy-causing dust mites, fungal spores, bacteria, plasticisers, flame retardants, and human skin cells — 8 hours a day, 365 days a year.” (Business Insider)

If you’ve had your mattress for a couple years it’s time to consider a CLEAN upgrade.

2: Where do I find a new mattress?

You could get in your car, drive to the store and get pushed around by a salesman as you lay on dozens of mattresses that dozens of others have laid on. (Refer back to #1.) OR. You could hop on your computer and order a Leesa mattress right to your door! It’s fantastic to not even have to get out of your pjs and there is a 100-night risk-free trial- love it or send it back. You won’t want to send it back. I wanted to have a Sleeping Beauty moment with mine and just sleep for foreverrrrrr on it. My husband was totally freaked by a mail order mattress but he is equally obsessed with it. Plus the set up was so simple and fun!

Leese Mattress x Basking in Burgundy

Leese Mattress x Basking in Burgundy

3: Why Leesa vs any other mattress company?

The Lessa mattress is made with 2″ of cooling Avena foam on the top, a middle layer of 2″ memory foam and a base of 6″ dense core support foam. Guess what? It’s all made and assembled in the good ol’ USA! Additionally, for every ten mattresses they sell, they donate one to a shelter. I love a company that gives back!

Leese Mattress x Basking in Burgundy

Have you tried a mail order mattress or do you have one of these amazing Leesa pieces? I’d love to hear about it!

Thanks again to Leesa for making my military move so much easier! We appreciated being greeted by a mattress at our new home.

It made all the difference while waiting for our household good to be delivered.

BTW Leesa is offering $100 off the purchase of any mattress just for you! So if you’re officially grossed out by how icky your current mattress is, now is the time to get your Leesa mattress custom made and shipped right to your door.

Click here to automatically apply your coupon code!

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Full Disclosure: This post is in collaboration with Leesa but all ideas, thoughts, and opinions are 110% my own! As always.



Beauty Reboot: 90s to 2010’s

“Don’t ruin a good day today thinking about a bad day yesterday.”


Fashion and beauty trends tend to go in an ever revolving circle. Here today, gone tomorrow and back the next! Let’s be honest, sometimes they are so bad we’re really happy when they go away and roll our eyes when they return. Other times we turn a trend into our personal style and cry when we can longer find it in the store! For these three beauty trends, they died down and came back new and improved. Let’s check out the 2017 recreations of some past trends:

1: Lipgloss

Basking in Burgundy: Beauty Reboot

Remember lipgloss in the 90s? Beauty gurus everywhere wouldn’t leave the house without a lip that was shiny and sticky or shiny and frosty! You probably had a drawer full of Lipsmackers (my fav was the clear strawberry one!) and Juicy Tubes. The wet look wasn’t practical- the sticky level was off the chart, your mouth could catch more flies than your windshield! The new lipgloss formulations are shiny and majorly moisturizing. They leave lips feeling luscious without your hair sticking to every square. If you loved your gloss back in the day, you need to try the 2017 update.

 My Fav New Glosses

2: The Metallic Eye

Basking in Burgundy: Beauty Reboot

The metallic eye of yesterday went from lash to brow. It’s not a surprise the blindingly pewter look didn’t go past a crazy night out and quickly died away! Do you remember the Bonnie Bell eye creams? If only primers existed to keep all the metallic goodness from sliding into the crease…. Today’s metallic eye stays put and compliments your eye colour- like this bronze and blue combo. This trend is back and ready to leave the strobe club lights behind and see the fresh air by day!

My Fav New Metallics

3: Press On Nails

Basking in Burgundy: Beauty Reboot

Do you remember the first time you convinced your parents to let you do fake nails? I was 9ish and was convinced press on nails would make me look so grown up- like a teenager! I picked out a yellow pair to match my favourite one size fits all yellow top with a daisy pin (totally Lizzie Mcquire inspired!). The rest of the weekend was spent constantly finding and trying to reattach the nails. Ugh. Definitely not the Hilary Duff nails I had dreamed of.

A while ago I saw my sister who had the most gorgeous manicured fingernails and I couldn’t believe it when she told me they were press on! Needless to say, I hopped right on over to Target to get myself a pair (I got out of Target for under $50 that day!). Upon application, I couldn’t even tell they were there, except for how amazing my nails looked. The new press on nails last through showers and dishes, can opening and don’t bubble off your nail! If you’re looking to shake up your manicure look I highly recommend trying out a pair.

The New Press on Nail

I’d love to hear your experiences with these trends or your favourite 90s trend!

Any #beautyfails or plain old #lols?

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Top 3 Ways to Shake Up Your All Black Wardrobe

“Wearing black is a lifestyle.”


Basking in Burgundy

(Disclaimer: This picture is not technically questioning my wardrobe choices, but rather we go caught by rain in the middle of our shoot!)

I swear my wardrobe has every color in the rainbow- except yellow or orange (they make me look like I have jaundice)! However, the only items I find myself wearing are the neutral pieces, especially the black ones. I greatly annoy family and friends when shopping because my catch phrase is:

“I love it. If it was black…..”

My blogging bestie Shell, from A Courageous Beauty, got to listen to that saying a million times while we traipse around Target last weekend! There is just something go to about my dark pieces. They always feel fresh and they always work together- especially when paired with another neutral, like denim. I thought I’d share today the top 3 ways to update the black pieces in your wardrobe and shake up your neutral look!

Basking in Burgundy Style

1: Look to the modern neutrals.

Black, white, gray, khaki. You grew up knowing these as neutral tones. However, for a modern feel look to denim, snakeskin, and olive as neutrals too!

Changing your definition of neutral will push your style to the next level.

Basking in Burgundy Style

2: Texture is key.

The best way to get away with all black everything is to add multiple textures to keep the look from falling flat!

Think lace, leather, denim (both a colour and texture), faux fur, silk.

Basking in Burgundy Style

3: Wear what you truly love.

I could give you all the tips and suggestions in the world! If you don’t absolutely love and feel confident in the piece though, no amount of “advice” will change that.

If you don’t absolutely love and feel confident in the piece though, no amount of “advice” will change that.

If black isn’t your thing, apply #1 and #2 to anything you wear! They are tips that will make your style more refined and give it that je na sais quoi that we all are looking for!

Do you have a go to color? I’d love to hear why it’s your go to! BTW I FINALLY found an amazinggggg dupe of my favorite Rebecca Minkoff tote that is always on my page. Yay! Enjoy your short week babes.

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